In gym, I hated the fitness tests...

Turning 29 caused me great anxiety.  No lie. 

The more I think about it, the more I wonder why though.  "Why, Lyd?  What's the garsh darn big deal?"  To be honest, I can't tell you.  I feel healthy, happy, secure, grateful...and I'm growing more confident about myself EVERYday.

Is this anxiety a vanity issue??...is it realizing time is only in the past??....I don't know!  Are we, as women trained to hate aging??  Again, I don't know...probably all of the above.

It's funny, but I've always been afraid to grow up. I wonder if it's because as a young girl, I looked so old and people ALWAYS thought I was older than I was...and people still think I'm older than my big sis...don't worry, I'm not bitter! ahahah :)

In 8th grade, I was new to the neighborhood junior high. On my first day, a student there came up to me and said, "Are you a new teacher?" I wanted to CRY. I was only 13!  I have a summer birthday and was always the youngest in my classes.  I specifically remember in 3rd grade being a HEAD (atleast) above everyone and wearing size 8 in women's shoes.  I also remember getting my awesome home-made "hammer pants" pulled down so all my goodies showed!  But that's another story.  But back to 3rd grade...we were supposed to line up in alpha order every time we left the room to gym, recess,or music etc.  I was at the end of the line (YOUNG) and I looked like a friggin giraffe..with afro puffs! " Did she fail 4 grades, why is she so big?"

In gym, I hated the fitness tests.  Everytime, no question, the smallest most mouse like girl would have to be my partner and try to hold my feet as I TRIED to do sit-ups.  She'd be bouncing all over the place and I'd be struggling.  My big feet would be kicking her tiny little butt...Yeah, not the business. Now, I can look back, and I can LAUGH...and wonder, is this why I don't want to age?  I doubt it.  I bet there's more to it...
 
SOOOO, here's what I think I'm going to do...I'm going to play mind games (with myself) I'm go to make 29 THEBOMB.COM year and force myself to be excited for each birthday to come.   :)  I'm pretty sure we all should go in to each year, day, morning, new environment with this attitude.  But don't write "thebomb.com" on facebook, you'll get in trouble.  Trust me.  I did.

bwwahahahhahah