Have you ever started talking about something and not know why...it just comes out uncontrollably???? It's totally off topic and out of the blue. Apparently, I guess it needed to be talked abouta then. Well it happened to me yesterday. I won't go into what it was, bc it doesn't matter, but I just started talking. I don't like to talk about my "problems" which is really just my "life" I guess, because one of my greatest fears is being judged.
ANYWHO...random, but during this conversation with a wonderful incredible fantastic woman, (I guess it was the right time to hear it because it touched me deeply) she talked to me about moments. I learned that loving, respecting and enjoying the (good aka God - Thanks Tina) in "moments" is okay! I always think about my life as BIG PICTURE, like how everything is connected...this is great...but so annoying at times! It makes it hard to love/appreciate what is done, what I do, what others do in a specific moment - like I'm always consumed with the bigger picture - like generations of undereducated youth, hunger, racism, discrimination, poverty...I mean the list keeps going...obviously, I believe these issues should not be sat on, but not consume an individual either.
In college, me and a good friend of mine - and he knows who he is...coined the term Kozols - Kozol was an author - an incredible author who wrote "Savage Inequalities" read it if you haven't. He spoke of the inequities in education, which is important - but in our opinion Kozol became obssessed and consumed which negatively affected people's perception of him and hurt the fight because people saw him as an angry extremist...get it? In other words, I can't get obssessed with the BIG PICTURE - because can lead to negative consequences!
Okay, so again I digress...I guess life can be pretty crappy boopy poopy, if not for me, for someone - there is always someone going through hurt, frustration, sadness somewhere. But what I realized from the conversation I had yesterday was that stopping to enjoy moments of wonderfulness is okay. Day by day appreciation...minute by minute peace...it's okay...it's great...it's NECESSARY. Yes, recognize the weight of the world, but don't carry it around everyday. Fight the fight, but don't get bogged down - the battle is NOT over. :) Here I go again...thinking of the big picture!