Yes. It's been a "bajillion" years since I posted last. I have been visiting family and out of my usual routine. So here we go...
As 2012 beings, I find myself excited and cautious. I am turning 29 this year! OMG. It's hard to beleive - only thing is, I feel like I don't know what to do or where to go professionally. This is exciting because I have options, nothing is really holding me back.. but me - but I'm cautious because I'm not exactly sure what I want to do with my life. Right now, I feel content but I know I could be doing so much more.
SO - my question is, what do you do when you don't know what to do but you know you want to do something and you know you want this something to be "more"...? How do you make opportunity come to you...or is it always there? I believe in the power of making choices, but what if there are no choices to be made? Other than just spinning your wheels thinking that you should be doing something, what do you do?
I'm thinking about my PhD...I love school, have always LOVED school. Take that back...I hated school but I love learning. Other than elevating my own learning...the economy and jobs make me second guess this PhD opportunity. Maybe looking at this differently would help...like a PhD could open more doors and having this PhD is not just about me - I know there is a bigger picture here...
But sheesh, I guess not knowing what a PhD could or couldn't do for me is making me cautious...maybe the not knowing should make me excited instead. I guess the power of the mind...just changing ones perception and the paradigm we (I) live in can be powerful. I guess I'll start working on changing how I think about my situation. I'll tell you about it as I try...keep reading.
On a similar note, this year, I plan to focus on my mental health. I am excited about not being an enabler, and allowing myself to be me. I think I am finally discovering who I am - what I like and dislike and not worrying if others don't like me for it...Figuring out this may help me figure out where I want to go in life. I look forward to wriring more about this later too. And one thing I am sure of is that as I sit here in a state of excitment and confusion/caution is I am only going to allow good things to come out of this... A good start, don't you think?
You pose some very difficult yet important questions that I think everyone at some point in time asks themselves.."What the heck am I supposed to be doing?" Girl I'm 32 and still haven't quite figured this out. I can understand your caution. It seems like degrees don't really promise us the life that they once used to, but just remember this.. Any means to grow is a positive one so if the desire and passion is there to excel to a higher level of education, I say go for it! What you will get out of it will be greater than what you will sacrifice. Besides I think Dr. Lydia sounds pretty cool ;) You are still young, you don't have anything holding you back or slowing you down so don't be your own road block. I feel we tend to over think and analyze things to a point where we talk ourselves right out what could be beneficial for us. In other words.. GO FOR IT! Whatever it is you're thinking.
ReplyDeleteHey Lyds, I just turned 29 and I have no idea what I'll be doing once I'm stateside again. I used to feel like "man, all my friends have careers, why no me?" Then I thought about what I want my life to be. I don't want to die with any regrets. Right now I am getting a master's in an area I previously thought I'd double major in in undergrad. I was pre-med all those years, took all those dang science courses too. At some point I will go to medical school and consider myself fulfilled. I can't worry about what dollar amount I think I'm worth when job hunting cause I'll be jobless like the rest of them, but I do know with education comes power, prestige and most importantly a good position (even if it is underpaid). If Dr. Lyds is something you want, go for it and figure out the rest as you go (I am and I have kidS and a husband).
ReplyDeleteThanks ladies...sometimes perspective is all someone needs. And Krys...DR. Krys...you are SO friggin inspiring. MED-SCHOOL! That is wonderful! I know you will reach your goal...I know it. And Charm...yes analyzing is my best friend ( I need to stop)...sometimes I think me analyzing is just me coming up with excuses...it's not even really analyzing. Aweee...I think I'm getting closer to peace in this area of my life.
ReplyDeleteI think questioning is exactly what we should be doing right now (at this stage in our lives). I think you will excel at whatever next step you choose. I also don't believe there in one "right" path to take, opportunities sometimes come to you and sometimes you have to go out and find them, in any event you are a smart and passionate person, so I'm sure you'll figure out what's next (and I'm grateful you'll be sharing the journey with us).
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